


MASOCHIST

by AnnurTsubaki



Category: Naruto
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Botany, College, F/M, Masochist, OOC, Possessive Orochimaru, Professor Orochimaru, forest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-04
Updated: 2018-04-04
Packaged: 2019-04-18 10:40:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,774
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14211375
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnurTsubaki/pseuds/AnnurTsubaki
Summary: He was the one who turned me into a masochist. He was the reason on why I woke up at 3 a.m. every night, thinking that there would be a call from him. He was the reason I changed.





	MASOCHIST

6 years ago

“Hey, we’ve finish sketching the leaves. Are you done with the report?” One of my group mates questioned me, handing over their sketches to me for final touch ups. We took a class in Forest Botany in our final semester, and that was our first assignment; identifying the different types of leaves in the tropical rainforest. 

I was never any good at drawing or sketching, thus my job was to prepare the report and provide references of our findings. These people were the ones I had formed a group with in each classes we took ever since we enrolled in this college, and this was the final semester before we graduate. 

“Yeah, I’m done.” I replied, putting the freshly printed papers in order before adding the sketches. “So, who’s going to submit this report?” I looked at them, but to no avail. No one volunteered to submit it. I should have thought so. There were bad rumours about our professor, thus everyone tried to avoid him even though he was the best in his field.

“Well, if you submit it in our stead, we will treat you to your favourite cake. Deal?”Sighing, I agreed with the deal. Unluckily, I was enticed by the mention of ‘cake’. I always did. 

Our professor had a strange persona. He had vast knowledge in his field, but to me he was scary as hell. And no, he was not scary as in ‘stern’ or ‘strict’. There was something else that I could not explain. His aura maybe. 

I headed towards his office alone. It was not because I was brave enough to face him, but it was because no one else would accompany me. I was always the odd one out ever since I was young. I had a few friends, but to say that I was in my friends’ circle was quite far-fetched. I did not have a clique. Instead, I mixed with everyone on a so-so basis. 

Knock! Knock! 

I knocked on his door, and in an instant, he opened it as if he was expecting me. I entered the office, shivering. 

“This is our group report.” I did not know what else to say. Putting it on his table while he was still holding the door knob, I turned back to leave. “I’ll take my leave then.”

“Who did the report? And who did the sketches?” He asked me suddenly. I trembled slightly, trying to suppress my uneasiness. Although he was only a few years older than me, I felt like I was caught red-handed by an old cop. Yeah, he was only a few years older but he was already a professor in our college. I did not know how he did that. A prodigy maybe? Or maybe he was just someone who loved learning.

“Wh-why?” 

“Nothing. It’s just that I remembered your sketches on your first day of class, and I don’t think that your group mate will let you sketch with that skill. It might jeopardize your group’s mark.” Yeah, way to go for shattering my confidence.

“I did the report part, and the sketches were done by my group mates. Is that not allowed, professor?” 

“No, not that it’s not allowed. It’s more about yourself actually. Don’t you want to do it better than you’re doing now? For the exams, perhaps?” I gulped. How did this conversation turned into my sketching skills, or worse the exams? 

“I do, but we have different skill set, Professor. Mine is not drawing or sketching. I’ll just have to make do with all I have.” 

“Okay, then.” He said, still holding the door knob. I rushed outside and bowed to him before leaving hurriedly. My group mates better treat me to an expensive cake, otherwise my sacrifice would be in vain.

Fast forward to the end of the semester

“I can’t believe he made the final exam based on our first report. How could he? He knows that Tsunade can’t sketch. And the marking scheme was ridiculous. You fail the class if you fail this exam even though you have enough carry marks? Nonsense!” One of my group mates voiced her discontent. I was too, but I did not know how to express it. 

“Tsunade, seems like you’ll have to repeat this class.”

“I guess so.” I tried to force a laugh, but failed. We left the examination hall separately. I took a leisure walk to the girls’ dormitory where most students had already finished their examination and headed back home. The ones staying were the research assistants that needed to help the lecturers, and of course, me.

I landed on my bed, facing the ceiling while thinking of my sure-failed examination marks. Why did he make the questions based on my one weakness? I started to think that the world was unfair, but then again, since when did the world fair? My grandfather was a well renowned figure, but I was almost a failure. 

That night, I could not sleep at all. I was thinking of nothing in particular, but still thinking nonetheless. All of a sudden, I received a text message from an unknown number. It was 3 a.m, and it was from my professor. The very one that tried to fail me with those stupid sketching!

I was told to meet him in his office in the morning if I wanted to save my marks from failing. That message reminded me of a few cases I heard when we first enrolled. The seniors used to tell us that he was a predator who preyed on weak students like me, that he molested them in exchange of their marks. But no one had any proof of that.

The next morning, I went to his office with turbulent heart. I was scared, yet I felt like I need to go. The college compound was silent with the students already gone. He greeted me in front of his office and ushered me inside.

“Tsunade, I’m sure you had received my message last night.” He said.

“Yes, but it was 3 a.m in the morning, Sir. Can’t it wait until this morning?”

“I’m nocturnal, I can’t help it.” He smiled, but I swore it was creepy. Creepy because I was alone with him, and the nearest person was in the GIS laboratory upstairs. “So, I’m giving you another chance to redeem your mark. Do you bring it?” 

I nodded, taking out the sketching book and utensils. What he did not see was the thing hidden in my back pack; a sharpened knife in case he tried to molest me as per the rumours I heard. But he did not need to know that.

Once I had set the things on the desk at the corner of his office, he gave me a book of leaf sketches and told me to choose the easiest. I had to sketch ten of them and if it were any good, I’ll get my marks. I started sketching, but with him eyeing my work, my fingers would not move freely.

“Sir, please don’t look at my work. I can’t sketch if you stare like that.” I said to him, hoping that he would understand. Instead, I received a smile.

“You’ll have to get use to it.” I saw a smirk on his face. Decided not to give a damn, I continued sketching the leaves. I did not realize he was not in front of me anymore.

I felt a creep. He was behind me suddenly and somehow, his hand entangled with mine, guiding me with the sketches. I could feel his breath, and I froze in my seat. What was he thinking?

“S-sir..wh-what are you doing?” I stuttered. With his hand entangling mine, I could not reach for my sharpened knife. Did he know that I brought it in the first place?

“Shh..I’m trying to guide you. Don’t be so stiff, I’m not going to try anything.” He hushed me, slowly guiding my hand. I felt like a puppet, moving by strings controlled by my puppeteer, except that the strings were actually his hand on mine. “See, it’s not so hard. You can continue on your own.” With that said, he released my hand and went back to his seat, leaving me at the corner desk.

And that was how everything started.

In the end, even after that ‘sketching lesson’ in his office, I had to repeat his class. That means I had approximately a few months time to spend in this college. I tried to negotiate with him to shorten the time, but he insisted to stick with only one class per week. And because his class was only offered every other semester, it seemed that I was the only one taking it this time. My classmates had already graduated, yet here I was, stuck with him. 

Since I only failed that one class, I had too much time on my hand. I got a part-time job three days a week in the library. Putting aside one day for his class, I still had three more days unfilled with any activities. 

Speaking of his class, it still creeped me out every time we were alone in class or in the laboratories. He never left me alone, and would sat beside me until the time was up. In time, I grew accustomed to his presence. Even when he occasionally called me exactly at 3 a.m at night, I came to realize that even if I slept early, my body would mysteriously wake up around that time. It was as if my body clock was set to get up and receive his call.

Mid-semester break

During mid-semester break, I was told to join his team to collect some fresh plant specimen in the nearby forest. Apparently some of the specimens in the herbarium were damaged and he volunteered to go and get new ones. I dislike going into the forest, yet it was compulsory as per his word. If I wanted to graduate.

There were two others joining us. Both of them were his research assistants, Yamato and Kabuto. They were excellent aides, knowing what to do without being told to. We went there in the morning and by noon; half of the list was already gathered. Taking a rest to have our packed lunch, I felt something slimy behind my back. It moved!

“Tsunade, why are you crying?” He asked me in worry. Yamato and Kabuto were eating their lunch somewhere else, thus there were only me and him there. I gritted my teeth, trembling again. I could not tell him, could I?

“What’s wrong? I can’t help if you don’t tell me.”

“My..my back. There’s some..something.” This time, I let out the tears that I had tried to suppress. That slimy thing moved again! He turned me around, but I refused to let him see my back.

“Okay, I won’t see. Just let me get it.” He said again, looking at me straight in the eyes. I nodded reluctantly, hoping to get rid of it at the soonest.

He took out a slug that was attached to my back, showing it to me. “It’s just a slug. It’s okay now, hime.” Smiling, he threw the slug far away from us. I felt relieved, but it was too much for me. And him calling me princess made it worse.

“I wanna go back.” I whispered to myself, but I knew he heard me. Standing up, he yelled at his aides, telling them that we would take our leave. Both aides nodded in unison, leaving me feeling guilty for ruining their schedule.

3 years ago

By this time, I was already married to him. I took a job as the college’s librarian so that I could be near him. The salary was sufficient, but I had to think twice if I ever wanted to go on a shopping spree or reward myself with luxurious gifts after a hard work. He could provide to me, but I did not want to burden him. I had a few better job offers, but love blinded my judgement. I thought that if I could be near him, I could endure anything. 

During this time, he started to beat me every time he was upset. I knew that I should distance myself from him, yet I could not do it. He was always sorry after each tantrum he threw. 

“Tsunade-hime, happy third anniversary.” He took my hand, kissed it and placed the large bouquet of red roses into my hand. Yeah, third anniversary since the day I went to his office, and first anniversary of our marriage. He chose this date as our wedding date just because of that. And he liked to call me princess whenever his mood was good.

“Thanks. Happy third anniversary to you too.” I said, smelling the roses. 

“Wait, just that?” He stared at me, taking a step back. “Why aren’t you calling my name like you always do?” His eyes changed, so did his mood. Crap, I ruined it again.

“I..I’m sorry. I didn’t mea-“ He grabbed my hair and pulled me towards our living room. “Orocchi, I’m sorry.” I yelped in pain, trying to control my voice as not to alert the neighbours. He pushed me forward and I fell on the couch, head on. Tears started flooding my eyes.

“Are you seeing somebody else at work? I swear if I found out, you’re dead, hime.”

“I’m not. You’re the only one I have.” He twitched his brows, looking at me again. 

“Have? So I’m the only one you ‘have’, not the only one you ‘love’. I see.” His tone suddenly turned icy. I knew he was mad. He had always been possessive, and I actually liked that frankly, before he turned abusive. “Tsunade..”

“Please don’t hurt me. I..I have something to tell you.” 

“Like hell I care!” A kick came in. Straight to my stomach. I curled up on the couch, holding the pain that started to tear me apart. My hair was next. He pulled me upstairs, by the hair, and I use every ounce of strength I had left to reduce the pain by grabbing his hand. 

Kicking the door to our bedroom, he threw me onto the bed. The very bed that I had spread with his favourite flower, roses. He looked confused at the sight, and his eyes instantly locked with an envelope that I put on his pillow. It was a sonogram picture that I took at the pregnancy clinic the other day. I was already seven weeks pregnant.

“Hime…are you..are you preg-pregnant? Are we gonna be parents?” He looked at me in disbelieve. I could not answer him. The pain knocked me out.

I woke up in the hospital, surrounded by my grandparents. They were both crying, and that moment was the moment I knew I had lost my baby. I saw him sitting on a chair outside. He looked devastated, which I had never seen before. And unfortunately, his devastated look was the last look I had before I was taken away from him. Apparently my grandparents applied for legal injunction to restrain him from seeing me, in extension of filing for our divorce.

I could not live without him…

Present time

I was scrolling through my Instagram pictures when I received a notification stating that someone followed my account. My heart beat faster when I saw the account name - Katsuyu. It was the name that he mockingly gave to the slug that got attached on my back that one time in the forest. Orochimaru. Was it really him?

I closed my eyes and wished from the bottom of my heart that it was him. It had to be him. I could not resist being apart from him anymore. These few years apart were the worst years of my life. Every single day I had was filled with thoughts of him, and each night I would stay up late in hope that he would call me like he always did when we were dating. I had become a nocturnal like him. 

Trembling, I clicked the account profile. It was filled with photos of me and him. So it was really him, thankfully. I did not realize that I cried. And I did not realize when or where did he came from, but here he was, hugging me from behind, wiping my tears lovingly. 

This was Orochimaru, the man I could not live without. He turned me into a mess, yet I love him all the same.


End file.
